TOPIC: Behavior as Communication: The Power of Play Therapy

POST BY: Grace Lee, AMFT - CLICK HERE TO SEE HER BIO

WRITTEN: June 27, 2025

WILL BE REVIEWED: June 2028

As a therapist who uses child-centered play therapy, I frequently meet families who come into my office feeling overwhelmed, confused, and often defeated. Their child has been acting out, maybe through throwing tantrums that last for hours, refusing to follow rules, being aggressive toward siblings or classmates, or suddenly withdrawing. These behavior issues often leave parents asking, “What are we doing wrong?” or “Why is my child like this?”

First, let me reassure you: you are not alone, and you are not failing. Behavior is communication, and when children act out, they are often telling us something they don’t have the words or emotional tools to express. In this article, I’ll explain how play therapy, a developmentally appropriate and highly effective form of therapy for kids, can help children who are struggling with behavioral challenges. More importantly, I hope to give you the hope and understanding you need to begin the healing process for your child and your family.

Behavior Is a Language

Unlike adults, children don’t usually say, “I’m feeling anxious,” or “I’m scared because of the changes at home.” Instead, they show us. A 5-year-old who hits others at preschool may be feeling unsafe. A 7-year-old who defies every instruction may be struggling with an internal sense of chaos. A 9-year-old who refuses to go to school might be dealing with bullying or anxiety.

Behavioral issues are not just “bad behavior.” They’re often a cry for help. They are a child’s way of saying, “I don’t know how to deal with what’s happening inside me.”

That’s where play therapy comes in.

What Is Play Therapy?

Play therapy is a developmentally appropriate form of counseling for children. Just as adults use words to process their emotions, children use play. Through toys, art, games, storytelling, and role-play, children can express their thoughts and feelings in a safe, non-judgmental space.

In a child-centered play therapy approach, we don’t force conversations. Instead, we let the child lead. We create a therapeutic environment where children feel safe enough to explore their emotions, test limits in a controlled way, and begin to make sense of their inner world.

Play therapy can be especially powerful for children with behavioral issues because it allows them to process their emotions without shame, while also learning new, healthier ways to express themselves.

How Play Therapy Helps with Behavioral Issues

You might be wondering, “But how does playing help my child stop hitting or refusing to listen?”

Here’s what’s happening in a typical play therapy session:

1. Emotional Expression

Children often act out because they don’t have the vocabulary to express fear, sadness, anger, or confusion. In the playroom, a child may use a puppet to show how angry they feel about a recent family change, or they may use a dollhouse to re-enact situations that are causing them distress.

This gives me, as a therapist, insight into what your child is experiencing. It also gives your child a safe, appropriate outlet for those feelings.

2. Building Trust and Safety

Behavioral issues often stem from a lack of felt safety. This can come from trauma, family changes, learning differences, or simply struggling with big emotions.

The consistent, nurturing environment of the playroom helps rebuild a sense of safety and predictability. Over time, this translates into more secure behavior at home and school.

3. Developing Self-Regulation

Through structured play and therapeutic interaction, children begin to learn how to regulate their emotions, delay impulses, and cope with frustration. For instance, playing a game that involves turn-taking can help a child who struggles with impulsivity begin to practice patience in a low-stakes setting.

4. Corrective Experiences

Children who feel constantly “bad” for misbehaving may begin to internalize that they are bad. In therapy, we separate the child from the behavior. We send the message: “You are good, and you’re learning how to make good choices.” This can be incredibly healing.

What Parents Can Expect

Starting therapy for kids can be a leap of faith. Here’s what you can expect:

• Initial Intake: We’ll talk without your child present, so I can get a full picture of their history and what’s been going on at home or school.
  
  


• Play Sessions: Your child will meet with me weekly in a play therapy setting. During child-centered play sessions, the child leads the play, choosing from activities such as sand play, art, or imaginative scenarios, to express thoughts and feelings in their own way. As we play, I reflect the child’s emotions and behaviors to support emotional processing, encourage experimentation with new coping and relational skills to build confidence and self-esteem, and set gentle, consistent limits to ensure safety and foster opportunities for self-regulation. These sessions are private, but I’ll keep you updated on themes and progress.
  
  


• Parent Collaboration: You’ll receive regular check-ins, practical strategies to use at home, and emotional support for the parenting journey.
  
  

Play therapy is not a quick fix. But over time, it builds deep, lasting change.

Common Behavioral Issues Play Therapy Can Address

Play therapy has been shown to help children struggling with a range of behavioral and emotional concerns, including:

• Anger and aggression
  
  


• Defiance and oppositional behavior
  
  


• Anxiety and phobias
  
  


• Grief and loss
  
  


• Trauma and PTSD
  
  


• Family transitions (divorce, relocation, new sibling)
  
  


• Social difficulties
  
  


• ADHD and impulse control challenges

Whether your child has been diagnosed with a behavioral disorder or is simply going through a rough patch, play therapy can help restore peace in your home and emotional balance in your child’s world. With the right support, children can heal. They can learn to manage their big feelings. They can return to being the bright, joyful kids you know are still in there.

As a counselor using play therapy, I’ve seen children go from explosive and withdrawn to confident and connected. I’ve seen families learn to understand each other better and rediscover joy in the parent-child relationship.

Ready to Take the Next Step?
At JCACounseling, every step is met with empathy, understanding, and compassionate, personalized support for individuals and families facing life’s challenges. Begin the journey toward healing and growth through Healing Through Connection—call to speak with a therapist today or schedule a consultation.

📞 Call 404-834-2363 or visit HTTPS://CALENDLY.COM/JCACOUNSELING to schedule a consultation.