TOPIC: How to Support Your Teen’s Self-Worth: Tools Every Parent Should Know
POST BY: Lillie Bamberg, LPC - CLICK HERE TO SEE HER BIO
WRITTEN: June 26, 2025
WILL BE REVIEWED: June 2028
Parenting a teenager today comes with a unique set of challenges—many of which weren’t as visible a generation ago. Thanks to the rise of social media, increasing academic pressure, and shifting cultural standards, more teens than ever are struggling with low self-esteem, lack of confidence, body image issues, and anxiety. These issues can deeply affect a teen's mental health, relationships, and ability to thrive in everyday life. As a parent, you can’t control the world they’re growing up in, but you can help them build the kind of confidence that lasts.
Here’s how to spot the signs of unhealthy self-esteem, why it matters, and what you can do— starting now.
In this guide, we’ll explore:
- Why self-esteem in teens matters
- Common signs of low self-esteem and anxiety in teens
- The negative consequences of untreated self-esteem issues
- Practical, evidence-based techniques to help your teen build confidence
- Helpful resources and expert tools for parents
- What you can do today to start making a difference
Whether you're just starting to notice symptoms or have been navigating this for a while, your role as a parent is vital in helping your teen feel seen, supported, and empowered.
Why Self-Esteem in Teens Matters
Self-esteem isn’t about feeling great all the time. It’s about believing you have value, even when things aren’t perfect. Teens with healthy self-esteem:
- Set boundaries and respect others'
- Handle setbacks with resilience
- Take healthy risks and try new things
- Feel more secure in their choices
- Are less vulnerable to peer pressure
On the flip side, teens with unhealthy self-esteem may:
- Be overly critical of themselves
- Avoid challenges
- Seek constant validation
- Struggle with anxiety, depression, or disordered eating
- Engage in risky or harmful behavior
This isn’t just emotional instability—it can have long-term effects on mental health, relationships, and decision-making.
Common Signs of Low Self-Esteem and Anxiety in Teens
It’s not always easy to tell when your child is struggling. Teenagers often hide their feelings or mask them with sarcasm, withdrawal, or defiance. However, there are some common signs of low self-esteem in teens and teen anxiety that you should watch for:
Emotional and Behavioral Signs:
Persistent self-criticism or negative self-talk (“I’m so stupid,” “I’ll never be good enough”)
Withdrawal from friends, family, or previously enjoyed activities
Fear of failure or excessive perfectionism
Difficulty handling compliments or praise
Increased sensitivity to criticism or rejection
Avoidance of social situations or new experiences
Signs of sadness, irritability, or frequent mood swings
Excessive comparison to others (especially on social media)
Over-apologizing or people-pleasing
Physical and Academic Indicators:
- Changes in sleep patterns (insomnia or oversleeping)
- Poor appetite or disordered eating behaviors
- Headaches, stomachaches, or other unexplained physical complaints
- Decline in school performance or loss of motivation
- Procrastination or giving up easily when faced with challenges
If these signs persist for several weeks or become more intense, it may indicate a more serious mental health concern, such as depression or an anxiety disorder.
The Negative Effects of Low Self-Esteem on Teens
Low self-esteem isn't just a phase—left unaddressed, it can lead to long-term mental and emotional struggles. Some of the most common negative outcomes of low self-esteem in teens include:
- Depression and Anxiety: Teens with poor self-worth are at a significantly higher risk of developing mental health disorders, including social anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder, and major depressive disorder.
- Poor Academic Performance: When teens don't believe in their abilities, they may not apply themselves in school, leading to underachievement.
- Social Isolation: Fear of judgment or rejection can cause teens to avoid friendships and social activities, further lowering their self-confidence.
- Body Dysmorphia and Eating Disorders: Teens dealing with body image issues may fixate on perceived flaws, leading to disordered eating like anorexia, bulimia, or binge eating.
- Risky Behaviors: Low self-esteem can drive teens toward self-harm, substance abuse, or early sexual activity as a coping mechanism.
- Suicidal Thoughts: In severe cases, teens may develop feelings of hopelessness that increase the risk of suicidal ideation.
Recognizing these risks is the first step. The next is taking proactive steps to help your teen heal, grow, and feel empowered.
Techniques to Help Build Your Teen’s Self-Esteem
As a parent, you have more influence than you might realize. The following are effective, research-backed strategies to boost your teen’s self-confidence, improve body image, and reduce anxiety:
- Practice Active Listening
When your teen opens up, listen with empathy and without judgment. Avoid interrupting or immediately offering solutions. Say things like:
- “That sounds really hard. I’m glad you told me.”
- “I hear you, and I’m here for you.”
- Encourage Positive Self-Talk
Teach your teen to recognize and reframe negative inner dialogue. Create a habit of writing or repeating positive affirmations, such as:
- “I am capable and strong.”
- “I deserve love and respect.”
- “My worth isn’t defined by my appearance.”
Consider creating a daily gratitude or affirmation journal to help them start each day with intention.
- Model Self-Acceptance
Teens are incredibly observant. If you often criticize your own looks or compare yourself to others, they’ll likely do the same. Instead, speak kindly about your own body and celebrate your strengths, even when you’re struggling.
- Set Realistic Expectations
Teens often feel crushed under the weight of perfectionism. Remind them that mistakes are part of learning, and that their value isn’t tied to grades, awards, or social media likes. Help them set achievable goals and celebrate the process, not just the results.
- Limit Screen Time and Promote Digital Detox
Studies show that excessive social media use is linked to increased teen anxiety and body dissatisfaction. Encourage your teen to follow positive, diverse, and empowering accounts— and take regular breaks from screens.
- Encourage Physical Activity and Creative Expression
Movement releases endorphins and boosts self-image. Whether it's team sports, yoga, dance, or hiking, help your teen find a physical activity they enjoy. Creative outlets like music, art, or journaling can also offer a healthy way to process emotions.
- Offer Unconditional Support
Even when they push you away, teens need to know you’re in their corner. Regularly remind them:
- “I love you no matter what.”
- “You are enough just as you are.”
- “I believe in you.”
Sometimes, just knowing they have a safe place to land is all they need to keep moving forward.
Resources for Supporting Your Teens
Here are trusted resources for parents to support their teen’s mental and emotional health:
Books:
- “The Self-Esteem Workbook for Teens” by Lisa M. Schab
- “Parenting a Teen Who Has Intense Emotions” by Pat Harvey and Britt Rathbone
- “Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood” by Lisa Damour, Ph.D. (for parents of teen girls)
- The Self-Driven Child by William Stixrud & Ned Johnson
- He’s Not Lazy by Adam Price (for parents of teen boys)
Professional Therapy:
- Look for therapists specializing in adolescents, CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), or DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy)
- Family therapy can also help strengthen communication and mutual understanding
Online Resources:
- Child Mind Institute: Mental health tools for parents and teens
- The Jed Foundation: Focuses on emotional health and suicide prevention
- TeenMentalHealth.org: Resources created by experts in adolescent development
Mental Health Apps for Teens:
- Woebot: A chatbot offering CBT-based emotional support
- Headspace for Teens: Mindfulness and meditation
- Youper: AI-based mental health tracking and self-awareness
Ready to Take the Next Step?
At JCACounseling, every step is met with empathy, understanding, and compassionate, personalized support for individuals and families facing life’s challenges. Begin the journey toward healing and growth through Healing Through Connection—call to speak with a therapist today or schedule a consultation.
📞 Call 404-834-2363 or visit https://calendly.com/jcacounseling to schedule a consultation.
